E3 was enthralling and boring in equal measure

Well, it came and went in a flash, leaving us a little broken but also a little happy.

Everyone tried their best to leak information early, almost like they could not wait to shoot their load all over the waiting publics’ faces but while some bits were revealed early, enough was held back to surprise us or terrify us. So let’s have a run through of everyone who held a conference.

EA clearly do not know what they are doing when it comes to doing a press conference. Like a wild man thawed from ice, they had fleeting moments of coherent consciousness before smashing it’s skull into the walls and defecating in the corner.

It was nice to see the 30 seconds of Mass Effect footage, it wasn’t so good to see five seconds of any Star Wars game in the distant future. It was not cool to wade through the sports games yet again and this is coming from someone who plays them.

Bethesda was solid but not spectacular. Fallout 4 DLC is always welcome, the Skyrim remaster should be a buy for anyone who missed it and Dishonored 2 looks promising, even if it enjoys misspelling it’s name in the UK.

Prey is going in an odd but not disinteresting direction and I’m sure some people will be happy to see Quake back, even if there is no interest there for me. It was like the family dog, dependable, caring even if a little dumb sometimes.

Microsoft hit it out the park. An astonishing rise from being a stumbling mess a few years ago, they have done very well to recover from their previous head trauma and get back on the offensive. While a lot of the games were just extensions of what we’ve already seen, they did a good job on keeping the pace moving and showing off some cool stuff.

I’m already hyped for Gears of War 4, We Happy Few looks incredibly enticing in a Bioshock-style vibe and Recore looks cool. The Final Fantasy XV demo was shocking, the custom controllers are a stroke of genius and the slight reveal of Project Scorpio has everyone very excited for the future.

Ubisoft was the sandman of E3 as they decided to softly lullaby anyone watching to sleep. They have stuff that looks awesome like Ghost Recon Wildlands and South Park: The Fractured But Whole, but they made everything stay for way too long and the whole thing lasted over two hours.

Their final reveal of Steep was the most underwhelming showing that’s every graced a monitor. It had no clear direction, there’s no clear fan base for it and you could tell from the mid-point of the video that no one will care about this game in about two weeks time.

If they do, it’s because they are desperate for an SSX remake that’s actually good.

Sony was nuts. They looked into our dreams, picked out all the nice things we wanted and made them come to life before our eyes. Just when you thought they had done giving you little chocolates, they’d hunt around in their handbag to give you a few more.

There is almost too much excitement to mention. God of War, Days Gone, Spiderman, Resident Evil 7, Batman VR, Crash Bandicoot 1,2 and Warped remastered and Kojima’s new game Death Stranding were all announced and left us wanting more.

Overall, it was a stupid yet fun ride again. It’s still insane that they dump almost all the big news for the entire year on a few days but that’s what they want to do, we just have to let all of this soak in and get a little excited for what lies ahead.

My head is still spinning from Crash coming back, what a moment.

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